laws radio edit

I have in-laws who i don't know already. It's strange. i get the scraps about these people, scraps i don't always ask for. I'm sure they're lovely, i'm sure they've got dreams, triumphs, failures, deep-seated neuroses and profound wisdoms just like the rest of us. But i don't know them. I wish i did, it would make for more interesting blogging. But i'm about to get a whole new batch of them, this time a bit bigger than last. And they're family too.

I had to pause and decide not to put that word in quotes.

So when i get a wallpost like this it kind of makes me wonder about family.

My sister is getting married in June, to a great guy who i totally love in the gayest way possible. He's like 6'4", smiles all the time, is brilliant and hilarious and not phony in the slightest. He's getting his goddamned PhD from Einstein in the Bronx soon. Guy's goddamned superman. And all of my friends know his sister, who is my age. It was even suggested that i date her, but that was a little too creepy for my tastes cause, ya know. brothers and sisters dating brothers and sisters. it's fucked up. She's cute though, i've seen her and maybe said like five words to her before.

I know my soon-to-be brother in law's room mate's girlfriend better than i know his younger sister. For fuck's sake. And this dude is from a nuclear family, there's like ten of these motherfuckers who are gonna gain the title of "in-law" in like three months. The more siblings you have getting married, the blurrier the definition of family gets. I'm not trying to pin it back down to something understandable, that's a goddamned insurmountable task regardless. I just think the idea of it is changing for me. Like the idea of sex changes after you lose your virginity. Actually, its closer to the way the idea of sex changes when your sibling loses their virginity before you do. If i ever get married, which is not likely because i can't hold a relationship together to save my life, then maybe i'll have a better understanding of all this. Or maybe an even cloudier one.

I have every intention of hanging out with his sister and getting to know her, all of my friends do, if i'd had the opportunity with my current brother in law then i'd have jumped at it.

it's just weird, that's all.

Oh yeah, here's a picture i drew of a wizard riding a train.


You ready to look at some dogs?

I think i am.


A foodblog, written by my dear friend katie, is emerging from its greasy, breaded chrysalis. Its wings crumpled and doughy, its exoskeleton thin and soft, it prepares for its first flight.

Typically i reserve talking about food for twitter, a platform that i believe was shaped for that very purpose. But now i feel that food-related reportage has been given a rich, full voice. A low tenor with a broad range, a voice to which the subject matter itself is unaccustomed. A katievoice.

Go there every day.


Last Plane to Jakarta

I've been devouring John Darnielle's blog lately. dude can write, and also make beautiful music that crackles with lyrical power and respect for his craft. This is a link to his blog. Read it. i do, and i don't even know any of the death-metal bands he's going on about. I just like the way in which he goes on.

And also, go listen to the fucking Mountain Goats if you haven't already.


Really digging on the new Yeasayer right now.

Like, whoa.

EDIT: additionally, a friend of mine suggested selling a cocktail that's made with supermodel tears after seeing the video. I wholly endorse this idea, and would even procure the materials for such a potion personally. And with pride in my dark work.



inspiration strikes like a lazer.


Wake The Dead Redux

Bearing palls, Respecting no laws.

We'll only be playing with spades.

Wear Black.

Wake The Dead Party

If you're invited, you'd know by now.



My brother John and I live on opposite coasts. I'm here in Seattle, he's in Philadelphia and it appears it will be that way for the duration of what we can both foresee. This is okay. But, what's cool is that we both have a PAX to attend now if he wants to make the trip to Boston each spring. This is just.

(i'd hate being god)

There may be a job opening at some old folks home (retirement community, not nut-house repository for the inconvenient and dying) which i'm gonna check out today at like 3. I met a girl who i like. This is good. Got a mystery check for 450 dollars from my insurance company and i am overjoyed about it. I will not ask questions. I will simply grin and cash it.

-hookers (quantity over quality, of course)
-booze (lots)
-booze (nice)
-an hour of a hitman's time
-a shitty scooter
-a dwarf, dwarf-sized armaments, a cave troll suit (tailor fit to my measurements), a length of chain.
-as much pork as i can fit in the carport, and then some.


been drinking.

Happy fucking easter. He is risen. glad we got that out of the way.

He is risen, of course, if you know what i'm saying. I'm saying something unrelated to doctrine. More of a dicktrine. Dicktrine is a joke about physics based gaming in its own right. Off to an amazing start here.

I'm still enjoying Blakroc, Deejaying it for my favorite bar (my "third place", quickly rising those ranks in the absence of an employer) about an hour before close just now. It was not a full house by any means, but the bartender extended an offer to bring music when he's working and play that shit. So that's cool. He reminds me of Steph in a lot of ways. Mainly in the "i smoke weed and say 'chill' a lot" sort of way. Deejaying was never so possible for all of us before the ascent of headphone-jack technology and the iPhone, and bars with the good sense to employ it. Oh yeah, i got one of those like 5 months ago. Don't know if i mentioned that.

So i'm having some social difficulties right now with a good friend, which is a stress and i hate the fuck out of the whole conflict. I'm hoping it stems from a misunderstanding rather than an actual disagreement. But, it's more important to maintain one's self respect than one's relationships, if forced to make that choice outrightly. That's hazy too. A resolution may be on the horizon, but those particular chickens remain uncounted, though not unconsidered.

"I've been finding it harder to be a gentleman every day." -Jack White